Gen 2:24 Counter Culture?

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

I’ve been praying for some sisters in the Lord who are having trouble in their marriages and I wanted to know what you guys think about Gen 2:24.

Here the most typical living situation is a joint family system as opposed to the nuclear family (husband, wife, kids) prevalent in much of the West (for lack of a better term). Joint family doesn’t just mean families living together, as some in the West do for reasons of finances or convenience. It means your every moment of every day life is combined with your extended family. All decisions are made as an extended group and there are complex dimensions of family politics constantly at play.

When a girl gets married, first of all it is traditionally arranged by her family. More liberal families allow the daughter to decide if she wants to accept or decline proposals, and some very liberal families allow their children to choose their own partners. This is rare and happens only in the upper classes. It is still not the norm to have an un-arranged marriage. Even many “love marriages” consist of a boy seeing a girl in the street and having his family find out who she is and propose to her. I’d like them to distinguish between love marriages, where you actually know the person, and “lust marriages” but that wouldn’t make it seem so dignified.

Even last week one of my friends was asking me to “find a girl” for her nephew to marry. She told me to bring his picture to the US and see if anyone was interested. I told her that in the US people tend to like to meet the person and know them for a while before they decide to get married. She said ok, “We can send him for a few weeks and he can find a girl at your marriage.” I had to tell her that a few weeks just wasn’t enough time, and that personally I had known my fiancé for about four years before deciding to get married. Even then we had only dated for a few months before getting engaged, so compared to American culture we were taking it quite fast! My friend finally started to realize that I couldn’t help with her matchmaking, and then went on to encourage her nephew to put in more effort at finding a nice girl.

When a girl gets married she usually moves in with her husband’s family. It’s more like she is marrying THEM, not just HIM. Husbands are completely subject to the whim of their parents, and usually dependent on them in the early years of marriage. A man will consider his closest bonds to be with his mother and his sisters, not with his wife. If a man’s sister or mother severely dislike his wife, he is likely to divorce her on these grounds. I’ve even been told that the closest relationship a man can have with a woman is with her sister, and his relationship with his wife is no where near as close.

Upon moving into the husband’ house the new wife immediately becomes subject to the in-laws. She must please them in everything. Her life becomes so intertwined with theirs that it is hard to say she and her husband have an independent relationship. Many times the only alone time the husband and wife is for sex (in which his pleasure is the goal, she is not supposed to enjoy it because it is an impure thing, she should not move or make any expressions), and otherwise there is no emotional or intellectual intimacy. Husbands use the wives as public showpieces of purity and prosperity, while they find their fulfillment in other ways such as pornography, keeping mistresses, or going to prostitutes.

The problem is that Christian marriages in this country are just like those described above. Born again husbands may not involve themselves in sexual immorality (they may), but this is certainly a poor picture to paint of what should be the relationship between Christ and the church. There are a lot of factors at play here, but I am starting to wonder if Gen 2:24 has something to do with it.

Since the husband-wife bond is not allowed to be so strong (cultural misconceptions about sexual intimacy, family power structures) it can never be in the way that God intended it to be. Instead of the husband and wife becoming one it is as if the wife is an appendage to her husband’s family. She is joined with them and not really with him, and besides that she is always treated as an outsider, a foreigner to their family. Unless she’s a cousin (cousin marriage is very popular), then maybe bridging this gap may not be as difficult. She is still treated as subordinate to the family, and even the husband is subordinate to the family.

This is not to say that we shouldn’t respect and honor our parents, but living under their complete dominance is another thing. I was wondering if it was just my Western upbringing that makes me cringe when I see joint family structures, or if it is something deeper. Now I am wondering if such a deeply imbedded joint family system can coincide with living as an example of Christ.

My Christian women friends long so much for intimacy with their husbands. They want time with them and they want to know them in a deeper way. Instead they are left at home with in laws and children and left to cry out to God for something more. Men here in the church (in general, there are a few exceptions I have met) also don’t see the woman as someone who should be spiritual first. I got criticized when teaching for a local women’s ministry that I didn’t make the messages “women focused.” They suggested I talk to the women about how to raise their kids and how to treat their husbands rather than on prayer, studying the Word and worshiping God.

If something is cultural, and not a hindrance to the gospel, I am completely ready to accept it. As Paul said, “I have become all things to all men.” Women here cover their heads when they pray, I do it. They are very careful not to leave their Bibles on the floor, this one is hard for me because I’m used to praying with my Bible on the floor, but when I’m with other believers I do it. They wear a scarf and conservative clothes, so do I. They communicate mostly with women at social gatherings, I do the same. They don’t eat pig and they don’t drink because these things are looked down upon by the whole society. While I’m with them neither do I, but I’m starting to think that the joint family thing is much deeper than not eating ham or covering the head. I am not sure that the husband and wife can be a model of Christ and the church within this cultural system.

Any insight?

Study the Enemy - Build up a Wall of Intercession

On praying into Eph 6 I was getting the following –

Study the enemy. Be a spy in the enemy camp, a secret operative in enemy territory. Fear not for I am with you. I will send my angels to protect you and guide you. I will give you insight. You must study the enemy. Study their strategies. Know what and who you’re up against so you can make a strategy. Be fully dressed in your armor. The shield of faith will go before you. I will go before you.

Study the enemy in the Word. May the demons know your name.

L may be a walled city but there are no defenses. Who will stand in the gap? It may be surrounded by armies an cantonments, but the enemy easily passes through unnoticed. Be a wall. Be a watchmen. L is overtaken by the enemy and she doesn’t even know. She invites him in. She sits, “I am the jewel of the orient. No one can touch me.” Yet she doesn’t know good and evil. Let us sing for her. Let us climb the mountain. There the lions and the leopards roam, but we can walk straight into the advancing army, for the shield of faith distinguishes their arrows.

Someone must sound the alarm. How can they escape if they don’t know they are in the midst of the flames? Let us realize that our defenses are down and the enemy is steadily advancing What are we gonna do about it? Oh God put up a wall. May we stand in the gap. May we form a wall around this city in the heavenly realm.

Spiritual Warfare

A few weeks ago my fiancé was praying for me and received a word of encouragement for me. “In Amherst God used you to lead others in prayer, now He is placing you in a position to lead the angels. You must understand the spiritual battle described in Ephesians 6. This is warfare.” As he shared this message with me I was overcome by the Holy Spirit and started weeping. I felt so ashamed at failing in prayer and yet so amazed at God’s mercy. Why would God use me? Why would God place me in such a position when I am such a pathetic and ill-equipped warrior?

Since then I’ve been praying through Ephesians 6. As I was praying in the spirit I saw a picture of an angel wielding a sword. He was fighting hard against an invisible enemy over the map of P. It was then that I realized this battle is so much more serious than I had imagined. I feel the Lord encouraging me to learn as much as I can about spiritual warfare and the powers that we’re up against here.

During the past weekend I visited with the believers in S, three hours from my city.
G has been speaking the same thing to them about how they have neglected the battle and need to not only engage in spiritual warfare when on the defensive, but to constantly be on the offensive against our enemy. They have had numerous sightings and impressions of demons (even one man has physically wrestled one), occult magic at work, and accusations on the legal level against the ch*rch.

Two of the M women I’ve become close to have admitted to me that they’ve visited “pirs” (priests, involved in black magic) and the city where I live is filled with shrines. This morning at 4:00am as I lay in bed I heard the call to prayer coming from hundreds of different buildings. I felt that this was the voice of the demons who reign over this city and that the battle for L (my city) and for P is one that requires a serious strategy.

Persecution reports not only in VOM but in NYT

I've been happy to see several stories dealing with persecution of our brothers and sisters in Christ coming into the mainline news during the past few years. If anything, hopefully this will give the lukewarm church in the West a wake up call about what our brothers and sisters are going through every day for the sake of following Jesus. Let us be united with them in prayer and any other kind of support the Lord calls us to give. May we be united with them.

Indonesia: Christian Pastor Shot to Death


By REUTERS
Published: October 17, 2006
A masked gunman killed a Protestant pastor on the island of Sulawesi and sped off on a motorbike. The pastor, the Rev. Irianto Kongkoli, chairman of the synod of the Central Sulawesi Christian Church, was shot in the head in Palu, the provincial capital. Sulawesi was the scene of wide-scale fighting between Muslims and Christians several years ago, and tensions have risen since the Sept. 22 executions of three men convicted of leading a Christian militia. There have been several bomb blasts and attacks in recent weeks, with at least two people killed. The provincial governor, Bandjela Paliudju, said the pastor had led Christian protests against the executions.

Malay Believer Refused Right to Marry Under Sharia

In Malaysia, many Muslim background believers lead double lives as their conversion faces them with the death penalty. Any ethnic Malay is considered a Muslim from birth and under Sharia law to convert from Islam to any other faith is to commit apostasy, which is punishable by death.

Finally this stuff is getting out in the news, not only on VOM but in the New York Times. Check out the article here:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/24/world/asia/24malaysia.html?ex=1156737600&en=89d3620e741606ee&ei=5087%0A

Our Role as a Disciple

Women's Ministry Series - Session II

Now we know that God has called us to be a worshiper of Him. The purpose of man is to bring glory to God. This is what we were created for. Another thing that God has called us to be is a DISCIPLE.

In the New Testament the word “Christian” is used only three times. The church started among the Jewish people in Jerusalem, but they considered themselves as Jewish followers of Jesus. They did not say, “I am a Christian” or “He is a Christian.” They said, “I am a follower of the WAY.” They said, “I am a disciple of Jesus of Nazareth.” It was at the city of Antioch, years later, that the word Christian began to be used.

Now although Christian is used only three times in the New Testament, the word “disciple” is used over 200 times to describe the followers of Jesus. The word disciple literally means “student” and “follower.” If we are to be a disciple, we must be a student of Jesus. We must be a student of Jesus’ word. In order to be a “follower of the WAY,” we must know the way! Jesus shows us the way and gives us all the instructions, the “map” we need to follow the Way. If we don’t read our instructions, if we don’t look at the map, we won’t go anywhere. In today’s session we will talk about the power of the Word of God, why we need to know it, and how we can study it to truly be a disciple of our Savior Jesus Christ.

So why study the Bible? Isn’t it enough to come to meetings once or twice a week? Isn’t it enough to listen to a preacher preach the Word of God on Sunday meetings? I’m telling you, no it’s not enough. Why? Because God has called us to be transformed and made new by the renewing of or minds (Romans 12:1-2). If we come every Sunday and on the inside, in our hearts, we remain the same, then we are not growing. We are not becoming a student and a follower of Jesus. We are merely listening to someone else. God wants us to know His Word in our hearts and in our minds.

If you have your Bibles please turn to Acts 20:32

In this chapter Paul is leaving the church at Ephesus. Ephesus is in modern day Turkey. The apostle Paul spent three years in Ephesus and he is now saying goodbye to the elders of the church. As he leaves, this is what he tells them:

“Now I commit you to God and to the word of his grace, which can build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified.”

Paul is leaving. He will no longer be the shepherd over this flock. He commits the Ephesian church to God AND to the word of his grace, being the Bible. Now he says two things about what the Word can do. Here we see that the Bible, the Word of God, has supernatural power.
The word can build you up. When you build a building you start with the foundation and then you build up up up. Sisters by reading the Word of God you will grow in your Christian walk. Now I don’t mean merely reading the Word, but reading it, meditating on it, and praying it back to God. You must turn the Bible into conversation material with the Lord. There are two things you can do with the Word when you read it. There are scriptures, verses, that can cause us to praise God. We read in Psalm 84, “How lovely is your dwelling place O Lord Almighty.” If we only read this verse, it will not do anything to build us up. If we even memorize it will not do anything to build us up. We must use it to TALK to God. We can read it and say, “God – your dwelling place is so lovely! God I know that you have created heaven as a beautiful place. Wherever you live, God, surely must be the most beautiful place. God thank you that you are beautiful. God thank you that have created a beautiful place for me to live in heaven.” Now there are also Scriptures/verses that encourage us to obey God. Two weeks ago on Sunday the preacher shared from John 5, how you are the light of the world. You can read that verse and say, “God thank you that you made your people the light of the world. I know that sometimes I’m afraid and I don’t want to share the gospel with my neighbors, but God help me to be the light. I want to be the light of the world. Lord let my light shine before men that they may give praise to You in heaven.” With every verse of the Bible we can pray something from it. With every verse of the Bible we can turn it into a dialogue with God. God wants us to be in a relationship with Him, and that means we need to have conversations with him! And guess what, not only can we talk to Him through His Word, but He can talk to us. Once we start using the Bible to talk to Him, He will use the Bible to talk to us. He will give us wisdom and understanding when we cry out for it. But, if we don’t ask, we don’t have. We must get in the Bible, read it, meditate on it, and use it to talk to God. In this way the Word will build us up.

So back to Acts 20:32 – Paul also says that the Word can give us an inheritance. How do you get an inheritance on earth? Your parents have money and they leave some behind for you when they die. Did you know that you have an inheritance from God? Part of our inheritance is in this life and part of it is after we die, in eternity. Our inheritance in this life includes the things that God will allow us to do to serve Him and to serve others. It includes our ministry, our families, our relationship with God. Part of our inheritance is that we are lovers and worshipers of God. In this life we have part of our inheritance. In eternity we will have all of it, but as Paul said, it is the WORD of God that gives us our inheritance. Wow! In eternity our inheritance will be ruling and reigning with Christ Jesus as he rules over all. Do we want that? Do we want to be seated with Jesus? Do we want to serve Jesus in heaven? This is part of our inheritance. But God does not give us our entire inheritance freely, we must fulfill some obligations. We must know the Word of God. We must be a true disciple/student/follower of the Word of God.

The Word of God can build us up and give us an inheritance.

Now most Christians who love Jesus think that they spend time in the Bible and that they know it. They bring it to their Sunday meetings. They bring the Bible to the prayer meetings. They carry it on a trip or put it next to the bed. But they don’t read it! They don’t use the Bible to make conversation with God, and therefore they are not changed. It is the same thing in America as it is here. Most believers, who love the Lord, don’t spend time in the Bible. They do everything else they possibly could. They do ministry. They get involved in a youth group. They teach children about the Bible. They preach. They teach, but even then they may not have a connection with God through the Bible. Jesus promised us that our hearts would flow like a river. That means that each person individually will have a connection with Jesus as a friend and as one who loves them.

Turn with us to Hebrews 4:12 – “For the Word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

God’s Word is alive! It is not dead. It is not boring. It is alive and it can change your heart and make you more like Jesus. If you think the Word of God is dead then you will have no reason to read it, but if you think that it is alive and active then you will want to read it every day. Not only is the word alive, but Paul tells us that the Word of God is our only weapon which is offensive. This means that the Word of God is the only thing we can use to attack darkness. The Word is often represented in the Bible as a sword. If you own a sword, does it mean you know how to use it? If I keep my sword sitting next to my bed for twenty years, and suddenly a robber breaks in, will I be able to use my sword to fight him? Probably not. If I do not train with my sword I will not be ready for battle. If we do not read our Bibles and use them to talk to God, we will not be ready for battle.

Jesus is coming back to the earth. He is shaking the nations. Spiritual warfare is on the rise. Do we know how to use our swords? Have we spent hours and hours training with our swords so we can use them? I don’t think we have. I don’t think we are ready. We own our swords, our Bibles, but they are not in proper use. We don’t know how to use them. When the time comes, we will surely be defeated if we do not know how to use the swords. Not only will we be defeated, but many will fall away from the faith. Many people who call themselves Christians will turn away from Jesus because they don’t understand who he is. They won’t know how Jesus works. They won’t understand. They will be offended by his judgments and they will turn away from Jesus. They will turn away from Jesus and spend eternity in hell. Are you ready? Do you know who Jesus is? Do you know what it says in the word? Are you ready to use your sword? Because I tell you, if you don’t know the Bible, if you don’t know the Word of God, you will surely fall away when that day comes. It might be easy to say “I am a Christian” now, but things are going to get much worse as Jesus comes to judge the earth. Are you ready? Do you who He is? Are you His follower? Are you His student? Are you truly his disciple?

In James 1:21 it says that the Word of God which is planted in us can save us.

“Therefore get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.”

What does James mean? I thought we were saved if we confessed Jesus and believed in his death and resurrection? Many people confess Jesus with their mouths, but do they really believe in him in their hearts? Do you really believe in Him in your heart? Do you believe his word is living and active? Do you believe He is coming back to judge the whole of mankind? If you do, you’d study the Word. You’d be ready. You wouldn’t be happy with business as usual. Day in and day out doing the same thing. You’d see there was urgency and that you have NO CHOICE but to know the Word of God. For the Word of God can save you. In Revelation it says that those who stand firm to the end will be saved. It is the Word of God which will help you stand firm. The Word of God can save you.

The Word can build us up, give us an inheritance, be our sword, and it can save us. So what then, sisters will we do?

Our Identity in God - Part 1 - Worshiper

Here are the rough notes from Part I of the Women's Ministry Sessions

Having Vision/Understanding Our Identity in Christ
What does it mean to have vision? Proverbs 29:18 says that “where there is no vision, the people perish.” Another translation says, “where there is no vision, the people cast off restraint.” Let’s say this together, “Where there is no vision…..the people perish.” If we don’t know where we’re going in life, we just do whatever and end up wasting our time. Vision is a mechanism that grabs the heart. If you want people to be committed to something you must give them vision. Without vision we have no focus, no goals, nothing that drives our lives. Some people have the vision to make a lot of money and gain many material things. This controls their lives. Everything they do is for money. Some people have the vision to become famous or powerful. Their pride drives their lives. Everything they do it to try to become more famous or more powerful. Some people have the vision just to survive to the next day. If their family is struggling to find enough to eat, everything they do is focused on just make enough to survive. Everyone repeat: “Where there is no vision……the people perish.”

All of those visions are limited and can lead us down a wrong path. Why? Because God has created each of us with a purpose that He wants us to walk in. God said these words to the prophet Jeremiah in Jeremiah chapter 1 verse 5:

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet for the nations.”

God appointed Jeremiah as a prophet even BEFORE he was born! Not even just before he was born, but before he was conceived, before Jeremiah was even a thought to his mother and father. In the same way, God created each of you with loving care and has chosen you to be HIS. He has set you apart and He has purpose for you in your life. God has created you and He has a plan for you. Also in Jeremiah it says,

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jer 29:11

In order to catch God’s vision, we must first learn WHAT we were created for. What did God create us to be? In our sessions we will look at the five things that God has created each of us to be. God created us to be:
A Worshiper
A Disciple
A Member of the Church
A Minister to the Church
An Ambassador to the World

Today we will look at what it means to be a “Worshiper of God.” What is worship? Usually in our churches we talk about the worship time as the time when we praise God with music and song. Worship is used to talk about the style of music, and the worship team is the group of people who lead the music. Now I’m telling you, if we think worship is just music we are wrong. Worship is SO much more than that. Worship is not just singing. Worship is not just music. Worship is a lifestyle.

In Hebrew the word for worship is Shakhah. It literally means “to bow down.” What do you think of when you think of bowing down? Who would you bow down to? A king, a leader, a master if you are servant? Bowing down to someone shows reverence. It shows submission. It shows respect. Worship is a lifestyle. Worship is a lifestyle of bowing down, submitting to God and fearing Him. It does not mean we literally need to bow down when we pray. It means that we need to be willing to give our whole lives to Him.

Jesus said that the greatest commandment was this, “To love the Lord your God with all of your heart, your soul and your mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself.” First and foremost we must LOVE God with everything that we are. We must be willing to give God everything. This is worship. Worship is not just singing. Worship is a lifestyle.

The apostle Paul shows us true worship when he writes to the church in Galatia,
“I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body I live by faith in the Son of God, who loves me and gave himself for me.”

I have been crucified with Christ: what does Paul mean? He means that all his earthly wants and desires are now gone. He means that he lives every day for Christ and Christ alone. He is bowing down to God with his lifestyle. He was willing to go to prison, to be shipwrecked, to be ridiculed, to be beaten, and even to die for the Lord Jesus. Worship is a lifestyle. Worship is the lifestyle of giving everything we are to God. Paul gave all of his insecurities to God. He gave all of his wants to God. He gave all of his needs to God. He gave all of his desires to God. He gave all of his worries to God. He gave all of his plans to God. He feared God. He was submissive to God. He was a lover of God. He was a worshiper of God. Worship is a lifestyle.

Listen to what Paul said in the book of Acts:
“I only know that in every city the Holy Spirit warns me that prison and hardships are facing me. However I consider my life worth NOTHING to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace.” Acts 20:24

Paul considered himself as nothing. He only boasted in his identity in God. He had vision! He did not live life without restraint, doing whatever he chose as the wind blew by. He lived life with a goal, with a purpose. To serve as a worshiper of God and to be all that God created him to be. He was not a special person. He was empowered by the Spirit of God. We each can live in that reality, but first we must realize WHO WE ARE in God. We were created by God. We are worshipers. Worship is a lifestyle.

Can we worship God through singing? Yes of course we can. We can praise God with singing. We can praise God with dancing like King David did. This is just one expression of our worship. But you know what else is worship? When you sit at home selflessly taking care of a dying family member. When you read your Bible. When you take time to pray. When you thank God for providing for you. When you aren’t afraid to tell your neighbors about the saving grace of the Lord Jesus. This is all worship. This is how we love God. We love and worship God by obeying Him. God wants a church who knows Him and loves him intimately. This is why the greatest commandment is to love God with all of our hearts, soul, minds, and strength. We were created to be worshipers and lovers of God. Worship is a lifestyle.

Before we go, I want you to learn Paul’s words from Galatians 2:20.
“I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body I live by faith in the Son of God, who loves me and gave himself for me.”
(read one part at a time with women repeating….do two or three times until they know it and can probably say it on their own)

Remember:
Without vision the people perish.
God created us to be worshipers.
Worship means “bowing down.”
Worship is more than music. Worship is lifestyle.